stupid!!!

i cry again..
so sad..
i hate myself..
why i so stupid?
what also don't know..
cannot do decision..
arrr...
just same as which college i want to study..
want go kl study..
but, it seem like not a good choice..
i want study which course?
graphic and multimedia design? IT? mass com?
study at where?
Equator? KDU? or..
how? i don't know again.. so shit!
my mum ask me study graphic and multimedia design at equator..
just because she know i like design on computer..
but i..
i scare..
this course less on teory..
most on our assignment, presentation..
i scare i can't do well on this..
and i'm poor in everythings..
english, communication, arts..
all bad.. T.T